I have to be honest, after watching
AIW: Hell on Earth X last night, I really wanted to review another show from these guys. I borrowed a copy of this show from my friend and he said I need to review this one and Absolution IX, which he didn't have a copy of. So once I get my hands on that, I'll be throwing it up here as well. Gauntlet for the Gold is an annual event held by AIW that is similar to WWE's
Royal Rumble event. The main even is a 30 man battle royal that starts out with two people, and every 90 seconds another competitor appears until there is only one man standing. The wrestler left standing will go on to face the Absolute Champion, Michael Elgin, at their biggest show of the year,
AIW Absolution X. So, when I say it's similar to the Royal Rumble, I mean it's exactly the same, and should be a ton of fun.
Absolute Intense Wrestling: Gauntlet for the Gold IX
March 14th, 2014
Turners Hall, Cleveland, Ohio
We get a few promos before the show of people picking their numbers for the gauntlet tonight. Some fun stuff here, nothing that stands out. There's apparently a match tonight for the #30 spot in the gauntlet, so that'll be fun. There is a fun part here when ACH comes to pick his number on a horse that got a nice chuckle out of me. I'm really really excited for his match with Louis Lyndon, that should steal the show. Donst cuts an awesome promo on the gauntlet and Eddie Kingston as well.
Tag Team Match
Dicks and Flips (Flip Kendrick & Ty Colton) vs Youthanazia (Josh Prohibition & Matt Cross)
This match has "awesome opener" written all over it. I don't know much about Ty Colton, or anything really, so this will be interesting to see how he does. Youthanazia might be the longest running tag team on the indies right now. I remember seeing them when I first got into independent wrestling and Ring of Honor way back in 2003 or so.
Colton and Prohibition start with some chaining and arm drag exchanges that ends with Colton going for a monkey flip in the corner, but settling for a spinning elbow off the middle rope. Flip and Cross and tag in and go to work chaining as well. Flip dodges a Cross clothesline and hits a big dropkick for a one count. They exchange some headlocks and arm drags before Cross his a leg lariat for a two count. Prohibition tags in and goes to work on Flip, but Flip drop toe holds Prohibition into the ropes and Colton tags in. Colton hits a senton on Prohibition and Flip hits an awesome moonsault senton onto Prohibition.
Colton covers for a two count. Flip tags back in hits an elbow on Prohibition for another two count. Colton tags back in and hits an elbow to the back of Prohibition, followed by a scoop slam and a leg drop for two. Colton tries a tornado DDT, but Prohibition reverses it into a nice butterfly suplex and a tag to Cross. Cross takes out Colton with an awesome back elbow to the corner and no-hands springboard crossbody for two. The announcer states he's jealous of Cross' beard and I can't disagree, it's a beautiful beard. Chin lock now by Cross on Colton before tagging in Prohibition. Prohibition hits a big stalling suplex for two. Another chin lock by Prohibition onto Colton as the crowd claps to pump up Colton. Prohibition tosses him into the corner and tries a superplex, but Colton knocks him off the ropes and hits a senton before tagging in Flip who comes in with a big crossbody to Cross. Handspring leg lariat to Prohibition was nice, followed by a wheelbarrow facebuster. Cross sends Flip into the turnbuckle shoulder first, and then hits Colton with a big double stomp before he hits a suicide dive to Flip. Inside, Prohibition rolls up Colton for a two count. He tries a double arm piledriver, but Colton reverses it into a suplex cutter. Flip comes in and misses a springboard 360 moonsault. Prohibition hits a crucifix powerbomb into the corner followed by a double arm piledriver, but Colton comes in before a pin can be made. Cross comes off the top rope, but Flip rolls him up for the three.
Winners: Dicks and Flips
Solid opener. Fans were into it, it had some cool spots and was very enjoyable to watch. **1/2
Fatal Four Way
Trevor Lee vs Davey Vega vs Tyson Dux vs Shane Hollister
I've never seen Hollister wrestle before, so I'm interested in seeing how he does here. Trevor Lee I'm a fan of, but he's far from my favorite guy in PWG. Hollister is pretty over with this crowd, as is Vega.
The match starts with everyone brawling with each other and exchanging chops. Vega is thrown outside by Hollister, while Lee is thrown out by Dux. Dux and Hollister get in each others face and start exchanging forearms. The announcer calls this a dream match and I'm confused as to who is having these dreams. Hollister takes advantage with a backbreaker and a suicide dive to Dux. Vega is next with a suicide DDT to Hollister. Dux chops Vega and tosses him into the guard rail a couple of times. Trevor Lee hits an awesome front flip over the ring post onto the other three. This match is off to a fast start, and the crowd is getting hot. Lee takes a backdrop onto the apron by Dux as he plays the crowd. Dux went for a crossbody, but Lee catches him and does a backflip with it! Seriously awesome spot.
Hollister enters the ring and exchanging chops with Lee. Lee tries to reverse a whip by slingshotting over Hollister, but Hollister tosses his legs straight up and superkicks Lee while he's completely upside down! Vega comes in and takes out Hollister before Dux suplexes him straight into the turnbuckle! Dux sets Vega on the top rope and climbs to the second rope, but Hollister pulls him down. Dux picks up Hollister for a death valley driver and then walks over to Vega and stacks him on top of Hollister! Amazingly enough, Dux hits a perfect death valley driver to both men!
Dux and Lee are face to face now and Lee pulls him face first into the corner. Lee goes up top, but Dux stops him and goes up top and hits a big superplex for two. Lee's chest is so damn red right now. Dux is in complete control until he hits the ropes and Lee hits a big leg lariat for two. Hollister and Vega double team Lee and whip him off the ropes. Lee hangs on and tosses Hollister over before hitting a gutwrench suplex on Vega for two. Hollister hits an enziguri in the corner on Lee followed by Vega hitting a suplex backbreaker on Lee. Vega goes for a lariat but instead Hollister hits a tombstone onto a laying Lee! Dux hits a death valley driver into the turnbuckle on Hollister for the win.
Winner: Tyson Dux in 8:32
This was only 8 minutes?! This match was insane from start to finish. Fantastic spots and everybody looked great in it. I'm starting to think AIW has the best scramble matches on the indies, because out of the three I've seen, none have been less than four stars. ****
Singles Match
Winner becomes the #30 entrant in the Gauntlet
"#All Ego" Ethan Page vs Bobby Beverly
We start with a lockup and some chain wrestling. I like Page's gimmick. He literally sees himself as the savior of wrestling, and even takes it as far as calling himself Jesus. Over the two shows I've watched, he's really grown on me. Page rolls outside and bickers with some fans before slowly getting back in the ring. Beverly hasn't quite grown on me yet, but I've only see him one other time. Chaining continues now until Beverly slaps Page and Page looks at him like "really?" Another lockup ends with Beverly locking in an arm lock. Some arm drags are traded until Beverly locks in another arm lock. Exchange of strikes ends with Beverly hitting a one legged dropkick. Page rolls outside and Beverly drops him with a kick from the apron before dropping down to ringside himself. Page starts to take control, but is thrown into the guard rail instead. Some more chops are exchanged outside before Beverly rolls him back in. Page's manager distracts Beverly which allows Page to hit a big boot and knock Beverly off the apron. Inside, Page stomps away at Beverly, but he starts fighting back. Page ends that quick though with a nice Orange Crush variant for two. Page hits a body slam and jumping leg drop for another near fall. Reverse chin lock now kills some time before Beverly fights out. Page goes for another suplex, but Beverly knees him in the head and hits a neckbreaker for two. Some strike exchanges ends with an enziguri by Beverly sending Page into the corner. Boot by Page is followed by a bicycle kick by Beverly, followed by a spinning fisherman's neckbreaker for two. Beverly goes fora reverse STO, but it's reversed into a Rock Bottom attempt, which Beverly reverses into an armdrag. Single arm headlock suplex by Beverly for two. Beverly is distracted by Page's manager as Page rolls him up and gets a three with a handful of tights.
Winner: "All Ego" Ethan Page in 10:02
This wasn't bad. It told a decent story, but it was mostly just an average brawl. **
AIW Tag Team Championship Match
The Jollyville Fuck-its ("Nasty" Russ Myers & T-Money)(c) vs The Batiri (Kodama & Obariyon)
Jollyville Fuck-its have my vote for the best tag name ever. Batiri debuted after I stopped watching a lot of indy wrestling, so I'm not familiar with these guys, but I've heard good things. It might be a bit hard for me to determine who is who of the Batiri until the announcers point out who's starting out.
T-Money and Kodama, I believe, start out with a lockup and some chaining, Kodama tries to shoulder tackle T-Money but it doesn't work too well. He tells Money to try it on him, but instead he trips him and rolls him up for two. Money does connect with his second attempt and Kodama tags in Obariyon, while Money tags in Myers. Some brief chaining and reversals ends with with a stalemate to an applause from the fans. Myers offers a handshake, but Obariyon just decks him instead. Kodama tags in and the two pound on the back of Myers. Kodama tags back in and Myers starts to gain control briefly until Kodama tags back in and hits a quick elbow drop for two. Another quick tag has Obariyon back in as Myers back flips out of a backdrop and gets the hot tag to T-Money who hits a big spinebuster for two. Money decks Kodama off the apron and tags Myers back in. There's been so many Batiri tags, I'm honestly not sure if I'm calling the right guy in the ring. Myers hits a quick elbow for two, but then misses a corner shoulder strike and hits the turnbuckle post as Kodama tags back in. He hits a flying chop on Myers for two as T-Money breaks it up. Batiri drop Money with a double team move before they hit a series of drop kicks in the corner to Myers for a near fall. That was a neat little sequence.Myers and T-Money hit a strange reverse airplane spin and punch double team move that ends in a burning hammer for a near fall.
T-Money goes for a powerbomb, but Obariyon breaks it up and Komada backdrops Money. Batiri have Myers on the top rope as they both climb for a double superplex, but Money comes along to break it up. Komada throws Myers off the top with a belly to belly right into Obariyon who is being held by T-Money! I described that terribly. Both teams are slow to get up, but Myers gets to his feet first and exchanges strikes with Obariyon. He hits the ropes and gets double teamed by the Batiri before T-Money comes along and hits a big shoulder tackle on Komada. T-Money hits an Alabama Slam followed by a Cannonball senton from Myers for the pin and the win.
Winners and still AIW Tag Team Champions: The Jollyville Fuck-its in 10:38
This was pretty solid and entertaining. T-Money seemed really out of place, but everyone else did really well. No real complaints. **1/2
AIW Absolute Intense Championship:
Louis Lyndon(c) vs ACH
This is the match I'm most excited for on this card. I'm a huge fan of both guys and they should be able to steal the show with ease. Not just on this card, but on any show they'd wrestle each other. Lyndon comes out to a fun remix of "Cry me a River" by Justin Timberlake. I laughed at it. He gets into a screaming match with a fan, and I mean legit screaming, no actual words I believe were exchanged.
Apparently these two were supposed to feud about a year ago, but ACH was hurt and had to pull out of the match. They circle the ring and lock up and start some chain wrestling and trading headlocks like the stock market. ACH has a waist lock on and Lyndon tries to cartwheel out of it, but ACH hangs on and cartwheels with him for a nice spot. Lyndon takes a shoulder block before hitting a vicious high knee to the face of ACH. Lyndon tries to stay on ACH, but he hits a series of kicks on Lyndon and knocks him to the mat. ACH starts chopping Lyndon a couple of times, and Lyndon's reaction to them is great as he tries to crawl out of the ring. ACH covers, but Lyndon grabs the rope to break the count. Lyndon is sent to the outside after ACH avoids a clothesline, and ACH misses a plancha as Lyndon misses. They start brawling outside with Lyndon hitting a pump kick with ACH against the guard rail. Lyndon might have one of my favorite pump kicks in wrestling.
Back inside, Lyndon covers for a two count. Lyndon chokes ACH in the ropes now until the ref forces him to break. Spinning neckbreaker gets a two fall for Lyndon. He locks him a bridging inverted indian death lock, but ACH won't give. Strike exchanges ends with Lyndon trying a German suplex, but ACH reversing it with some big repeated forearms to the back of Lyndon. ACH Goes to hit the ropes, but Lyndon jumps him and locks him in a nice dragon sleeper. ACH escapes with strikes to the face and low blow. Chops in the corner by ACH as he takes control, Control is brief though as Lyndon hits a springboard moonsault directly into a dragon sleeper! That was insane.
By some miracle, ACH was able to roll and get the ropes. I don't mark out for much, but I legitimately marked out for that dragon sleeper. Lyndon goes for a palm strike in the corner, but ACH tosses him onto the apron, jokes on him though 'cause Lyndon chops him in the neck. Lyndon is up top and goes for a crossbody, but ACH moves and Lyndon eats canvas! ACH starts slapping Lyndon before beating him with some nice strikes. ACH hits a reverse STO sending Lyndon face first into the turnbuckle for a two count. They slide out of the ring and ACH hits the reverse STO onto the apron before hitting a big plancha that sent Lyndon into the guard rail. ACH hits a slingshot cutter for two. ACH actually spun with it too, so I guess we can add corkscrew to that, nice spot. This match has been great so far. ACH is calling for the finish, but I really want these guys to go on all night. ACH goes for a double underhook something, but Lyndon hits a big palm strike.
They reverse each other a couple of times until Lyndon kicks ACH in the face and hits a roll-through Dragon suplex for two! Lyndon tries for another dragon suplex, but ACH counters but take a boot from Lyndon before hitting a huge leg lariat. He follows with a fisherman's brain buster and goes up top and hits a massive 450 splash but Lyndon grabs the rope! Ethan page comes out and distracts ACH, and it works. Lyndon rolls up ACH but only gets a two! ACH rolls up Lyndon for two. Lyndon goes to spear ACH, but ACH side steps him and he hits a suicide dive to Ethan Page! ACH fakes a baseball slide but hits his signature spring board tope con hilo! ACH rolls Lyndon back in and goes up top, the ref is checking on Lyndon and Page crotches ACH! Lyndon hits a massive reverse hurricanrana on ACH for another near fall before locking in a vicious dragon sleeper for the submission victory.
Winner and still AIW Absolute Intense Champion: Louis Lyndon in 16:68
This might be in my top 5 matches of 2014. This was fantastic. Easily my favorite indy match of 2014 and I legitimately can only think of 3 or 4 more I enjoyed more than this one from even the bigger feds. This had the sick spots, the awesome psychology and story with a damn good finish that made sense. This match is a must watch for any wrestling fan. ****1/4
With the way this show has been so far, and the way Hell on Earth X went down, I'm starting to think AIW is the most underrated indy fed in America.
Singles Match:
Tim Donst vs Eddie Kingston
I like Kingston's style of wrestling, and it should be interesting to see how he does here with Donst. Kingston doesn't even get an entrance as Kingston attacks Donst during his, and just starts beating the crap out of him. They quickly go outside so the ref can clear the streamers from the ring. Donst hasn't even gotten his jacket off yet, but Kingston is still beating him around the ringside area. Donst just gets tossed around from guard rail to guard rail and a dozen hard strikes at least. Kingston finally rolls Donst inside, and he immediately comes back with a suicide dive and a big running splash off the apron into Kingston and the guard rail. The match officially starts now, and Donst takes control with a corner splash for not even a one count. Donst tries to lift Kingston, but he reverses a few back suplexes and hits a nice big boot. Kingston takes down the straps of his singlet and starts choking Donst with his foot. Kingston rips off Donst's shirt and keeps pounding on him with hard shots. Donst chops Kingston, but Eddie just shoves Donst back into the corner and beats on him some more. Suplex by Kingston gets a two count. Kingston apparently is working with an injured arm. Donst gets to his feet and starts taunting Kingston after every strike. A couple of clothesline by Donst works well for him as he follows them up with an STO for two.
Donst is chopping Kingston in the corner now, but Eddie reverses an irish whip and hits a big boot in the corner. Kingston spits on Donst who reverses a kick into an awesome regal-plex. Nice spot there. Both men are down. They both get to their knees and start exchanging strikes. Kingston stands up and starts slapping him. Kingston hits the ropes, but Donst hits a cutter and starts slapping Kingston. He goes for a suplex, but Kingston counters with a Saito suplex and a powerbomb for two! Nice sequence there by these guys. Kingston goes for a sliding lariat to Donst, but it's reversed into a modified Rings of Saturn submission! Awesome reversal. Kingston tries to power out, but Donst rolls him into a crucifix for two.
They both get up and Kingston hits a big clotheslines and a sambo suplex for two. Kingston calls for the backfist to the future, but Donst reverses it into an awesome cutter. I think it was supposed to be a neckbreaker, but Kingston rotated completely with it. I loved it though, so I won't knock it. Donst then goes back into that chicken wing crossface modified submission. Kingston has to tap out!
Winner: Tim Donst in 10:46
This was a pretty damn solid brawl from start to finish. It had some cool spots, told a solid story and had me invested beginning to end. ***
Donst gets on the mic and a "Thank you Donst" chant starts up, and Donst points around the crowd and says "No, Thank you guys". Donst talks about how he's shaken the hands of everyone he has ever faced, but he will never shake the hands of "that piece of shit" referring to Kingston. Kingston floors him with a chair and attacks the knee before locking in a kneebar. He has it in for a real long time before the refs get him to let it go. This kind of tells me already who is going to win the gauntlet tonight. When Kingston leaves, Donst gets back on the mic and begs Kingston to come back to the ring. Kingston throws a big ass trashcan and leaves again. A pretty funny "You're Donst's Bitch" chant starts before we fade out of the segment. I'll actually raise the match ranking to a ***1/4 because the post-match stuff was awesome too.
AIW Absolute Championship
Andrew Everett vs Michael Elgin(c)
I absolutely do not like Michael Elgin. I honestly am not sure why he was so over for so long on the indies, but maybe he can show me something here. I don't know who Andrew Everett is, but if he's in the title match here there must be something to him. I trust the AIW booking at this point. Everett comes out to "No Sleep Til Brooklyn" by the Beastie Boys and suddenly I want to fight for my right to party. Bad jokes aside, he looks like Rhett Titus, but then botches his own leap over the top rope. This could be a long long match. Elgin has the worst looking mullet in history. Like, Billy Ray Cyrus looks like a fucking super model in comparison.
We're underway now and they lockup, but Everett is overpowered quickly as he's shoved off. I get Elgin is built like a strongman, but he's a short and bulky dude. I don't think he should be working the power style. He seems more of a brawler build for me. They exchange some ground wrestling holds that sees Elgin hit a couple of shoulder blocks while holding onto the wrist lock he has on Everett. The chaining here is pretty uneventful and kind of boring to start. It's nothing you haven't seen in every indy match ever. The really slow start is telling me it's a match on the long side, hopefully it picks up. Shoulder block by Elgin sees Everett kip up, so Elgin kicks him in the head. They exchange some reversals until Everett does a back handspring into a headscissors. Pretty simple, but it looked real nice.
Everett goes for a suicide dive, but sees Elgin move and instead handsprings into the ropes and waits for Elgin to get back in the ring. Elgin calls for a test of strength, but Everett shouts "NO!" then fakes it and puts Elgin in a head lock. Elgin gets out of it and tells Everett to try a shoulder block. A series of reversals ends with another headscissors by Everett. Everett is on the apron and pulls down the top rope sending Elgin to the floor. Everett goes for a crossbody off the apron, but Elgin catches him in an awesome powerslam. Elgin whips Everett into the guard rail and Everett goes sideways into it! I like that here, it looks more brutal and takes a lot more balls to do than a normal turn and bump. I'll give Everett credit here, he's bumping his ass off. Possibly literally at this point. Some chops against the guard rail by Elgin. I'm thinking if early years Chris Benoit and Rusev had a child, it'd look like Michael Elgin.
Inside, Elgin covers for a two and Everett starts to fight back but Elgin knees him in the face and goes for a suplex. He decides to start stalling with it and the crowd starts counting. Elgin is really strong, but Everett seems to have trouble posting for so long. The crowd literally lost the count and this is really funny. They may or may not have recovered the count, but they hit 60 anyway and Elgin completes the suplex for two. This crowd cannot count. That's amazing. Elgin hits a few knees to the back and locks in a reverse chin lock on Everett who tries to fight back with a jawbreaker.
Everett fights back a bit but eats a boot and then a german suplex into the corner! That was cool. Elgin gets a two count from it, but Everett has had no offense to this point. He tries to mount some as he starts exchanging forearms with Elgin. Elgin goes for a powerbomb, but Everett trips him and hits a quick double stomp and both guys are down. Elgin charges at Everett, but he moves and hits a couple of forearms off the rope. He tries to whip Elgin into the corner, but Elgin tosses him into one and Everett hits the weirdest springboard dropkick sequence. It was awesome athleticism. Not many guys can do that one. Everett hits an enziguri that sends Elgin to the floor as Everett hits a nice moonsault plancha. Back inside, Everett cover for a two count.
Everett goes up top, Elgin tries to break it up, but Everett jumps over him to avoid it. A few reversals ends in a nice slam by Elgin. Elgin hits a deadlift suplex side slam on Everett, who was on his knees, and that was pretty cool. Elgin goes for a powerbomb, but Everett slips out and hits a big enziguri on Elgin, but Elgin is still on his feet. He goes for a german suplex, and Elgin tries his own, but Everett backflips out of it and hits a tornado ddt followed by a standing moonsault for a two count. Everett heads back up top, but Elgin stops him and climbs up with him. Superplex attempt is thwarted as Everett blocks it and hits a sunset powerbomb and goes up top again. Everett goes for a huge moonsault but connects with the knees of Elgin. Beautiful moonsault there.
Elgin tosses Everett onto the apron and climbs to the middle rope. He tries a deadlift superplex, but Everett blocks it and hits a beautiful springboard shooting star press for two. Everett has fantastic form on his flips. A big chant gets going for Andrew Everett and I agree, he's doing awesome in this match, both guys are, actually. Everett sits Elgin on the top rope and climbs up with him. This is a big mistake, as Elgin hits a powerbomb off the top, followed by one into the corner. Elgin goes for another one, but Everett rolls him up and gets a shocking two count. Strike exchange now ends with Everett getting control and going up top one more time. Elgin stops him again by shoving him off the top rope and into the guard rail outside the ring. Powerbomb by Elgin into the guard rail, followed by a powerbomb into the turnbuckle inside the ring, followed by a spinning sit out powerbomb for the win.
Winner and still AIW Absolute Champion: Michael Elgin in 18:21
This was really solid match. I didn't know what to expect from Everett, but he held his own in this match and it was solid all around. Outside of the really dull first few minutes, it flew by. ***
After the match, Elgin extends his hand to Everett and they shake hands without incident as Everett gets an ovation.
Gauntlet for the Gold (30-Man Royal Rumble) Match:
Okay, so I've never seen an indy fed try to do a Rumble match, while I'm sure it's been done more than 150,000 times, I'm interested in seeing how AIW does it. AIW seems to have the best scramble matches and insanely good tag matches as well. This could be great, it could be awful, let's see.
With this match, I'm not going to do a play by play, as I'm sure this will get crazy fast, but rather we'll have highlights and the order of entry and elimination as well. If they have a stable affiliation, I'll include that in parenthesis.
1st Entrant: Gregory Iron. Greg I still think is horrible, and I really hope he's eliminated quickly.
2nd Entrant: Veda Scott. It seems these two are in the middle of a feud, so this isn't a surprising draw. The way AIW is doing it, is every 90 seconds somebody new enters. Veda is pissed and she's wrecking Iron's face, I approve. Veda hits a nice back suplex on Iron here, but Iron hits a crappy looking stiff forearm to her and then sits on her and slaps her. I get he's a heel, but that's dumb. She low blows him and dumps him over the top rope!
Gregory Iron is eliminated. Third Entrant: Joey Martini (Iron Curtain). Martini comes in and starts messing up Veda pretty easily, hitting her with a nice F-5. I really think the F5 might be my favorite finisher in all of wrestling. Doesn't matter who is doing it. He puts Veda through the middle rope and puts a vicious choke on her.
Fourth Entrant: Benjamin Boone (Iron Curtain).
Gregory Iron breaks a bottle over the face of Veda. It sounded vicious, but the camera angle really missed all of it. Refs are checking on Veda after she rolled under the bottom rope and Veda is busted open!
#5 Entrant: Jerry (Iron Curtain). This is strange booking. It's Veda Scott vs the entire stable she's feuding with. Iron has been eliminated, so him still beating on her is really stupid I think. Veda is just getting the shit beat out of her and she is a mess. Iron continues to choke her with duct tape. Sixth
Entrant: T-Money (Jollyville Fuck-its) T-Money gets a pop and he starts clearing house to save Veda. Good, that shit with Veda was getting uncomfortable. T-Money hits a shoulder tackle on Jerry and Benjamin Boone and they go over the top rope.
Jerry and Benjamin Boone are eliminated.
7th Entrant: The Duke (#NIXON) Duke goes right after T-Money and hits a few strikes in the corner. Doesn't last long as Duke is taken out with a clothesline and a slap.
8th Entrant: Leah Von Dutch(#NIXON). Veda is a mess. Jesus christ, what a blade job. Duke and Money are choking each other a bunch. Leah Von Dutch comes in and tosses Veda over the top rope.
Veda Scott is eliminated. 9th Entrant: Eric Ryan. Money hits an awesome pounce on Von Dutch before being tossed out by Duke.
T-Money is eliminated. Outside of the Veda stuff, there haven't been more than 3 or four in the ring at once. I hope that changes. Ryan hits a suicide dive on Duke after Duke leaves through the middle rope. Von Dutch starts stomping on Ryan and puts him in a reverse chin lock. Duke looks more like an accountant than a wrestler.
10th Entrant: Christian Faith.
Christian Faith is the masked character of Rickey Shane Page, and he gets a gigantic pop. He immediately floors Duke and Dutch with a double dropkick. Ryan hits a big coast to coast dropkick on Duke.
11th Entrant: Allysin Kay. Kay goes right after Dutch. Christian Faith and Eric Ryan hit an awesome double guillotine slingshot on Duke, but the camera angle was off.
12th Entrant: Louis Lyndon. Allysin Kay tosses Von Dutch over the top rope.
Leah Von Dutch is eliminated. Christian Faith knocks Allysin Kay on the apron, and Leah Von Dutch rips her off the apron to eliminate Allysin Kay.
Allysin Kay is eliminated. 13th Entrant: Ty Colton. The announcer mistakingly calls him Michael Bolton. Colton starts attacking everyone, but focuses on Duke but is unable to eliminate him on his own. The ring is starting to fill up.
14th Entrant: Seleziya Sparx. Wow! Faith and Ryan were trying to toss Duke over the rope, but Sparx comes in and dumps out all three men!
Christian Faith, Eric Ryan and The Duke have all been eliminated.
This is followed immediately by Sparx powerbombing Ty Colton onto the three men on the outside! Sparx is on FIRE!
Ty Colton is eliminated. Louis Lyndon superkicks Sparx though and sends her into the corner. He tries to eliminate her, but is unsuccessful.
15th Entrant: Aaron Bauer. Aaron Bauer takes forever to enter the ring, and Eddie Kingston is pissed that he isn't it, but Bauer is. Bauer is incredibly annoying as he just circles the ring without actually entering it. This isn't really funny or anything.
16th Entrant: Jock Samson.
Aaron finally enters, but is immediately thrown out by Sparx. Aaron Bauer is eliminated. Jock Samson has a hillbilly gimmick, and I have no idea who he is. Samson tells Sparx he wants her all night behind the dumpster, so she kicks him in the nuts and bulldogs him.
17th Entrant: Marion Fontaine. I love Fontaine. He's hilarious and talented. Fontaine refuses to fight Sparx, and instead jumps into her arms and she headbutts him. Pretty funny spot. The four have a staredown in the corner.
18th Entrant: Tyson Dux. Dux is actually growing on me the more I see him. Samson proposes he and Dux double team Sparx behind the dumpster, but Dux just throws Samson over the top rope.
Jock Samson is eliminated. 19th Entrant: Obariyon (The Batiri) Everyone continues to attack everyone else, but nothing of note really happens between Obariyon's entrance and the
20th Entrant: Josh Prohibition (Youthanazia). Dux picks up Sparx and hits a big death valley driver in the middle of the ring before tossing her out.
Seleziya Sparx is eliminated.
21st Entrant: Tim Donst. Tim Donst rules, but he comes out limping after the assault by Eddie Kingston after their match. He can barely stand, and actually has to slide under the bottom rope to get in, awesome selling. He goes right after Obariyon of the Batiri who goes after his leg immediately, but Donst hits a cutter out of nowhere.
22nd Entrant: Kodama (The Batiri). Kodama comes in and goes after Dux who's got Obariyon on the ropes. The Batiri go to work on Dux, but both of them get eliminated instead!
Kodama and Obariyon are eliminated. 23rd Entrant: Matt Cross (Youthanazia). Cross and Prohibition start going to work on Dux, but Cross eliminated Prohibition instead!
Josh Prohibition is eliminated. Prohibition can't believe it and is pissed at Cross.
24th Entrant: "Nasty" Russ Myers (Jollyville Fuck-its). Myers goes right after Dux, but Dux gets control quickly before Donst comes over and chops the crap out of Dux. Myers is back on Dux now and tries to lift him out, while Cross tries to eliminate Lyndon.
25th Entrant: Bobby Beverly. Beverly comes in and goes right after Dux,
and actually eliminates him!
Tyson Dux is eliminated. They had a really bad angle on that, so even the announcers were confused as to whether or not Dux was out.
26th Entrant: ACH. While ACH is on his way out, Bobby Beverly was dumped out of the ring.
Bobby Beverly is eliminated. ACH actually entered from the crowd and went right after Lyndon, that was a fun entrance. ACH and Lyndon trade strikes in the corner, while Myers and Donst fight as well as Fontaine and Cross, who are fighting on the apron.
27th Entrant: Davey Vega. Vega teams up with ACH to try and eliminate Lyndon. They're unsuccessful, as Lyndon takes control of them both. Lyndon tosses ACH onto the apron. ACH goes for a springboard, but Lyndon hits him with a pump kick to eliminate him!
ACH is eliminated. Lyndon turns his attention to Myers, but Myers pulls down the top rope and Lyndon goes over!
Louis Lyndon is eliminated. 28th Entrant: Flip Kendrick. I love Flip, so hopefully he can add some more excitement to this match that has been really dull at times. He goes right after Donst, attacking the bad leg. He hits a nice moonsault reverse DDT on Donst.
29th Entrant: Jimmy Olsen. He comes in and immediately hits this weird powerbomb move they called the "overbomb" on Flip. He goes to work tearing everybody up, he tosses Donst into Flip Kendrick.
Flip Kendrick is eliminated. Tim Donst goes over as well, but is able to hang up.
30th Entrant: Ethan Page. Everyone has entered now, and the eliminations come quick. Cross is tossed out by Davey Vega.
Matt Cross is eliminated. Vega is tossed out by Donst.
Davey Vega is eliminated. We're down to five now, until Fontaine eliminated Myers.
"Nasty" Russ Myers is eliminated. Fontaine is tossed out by Page.
Marion Fontaine is eliminated. Jimmy Olsen is then eliminated by Ethan Page.
Jimmy Olsen is eliminated. We're down to two now, it's Ethan Page vs Tim "Fucking" Donst. Page. Page goes to toss Donst over the top rope, but Donst reverses it and throws Page over for the win!
 |
| Your winner: Tim 'Fucking' Donst! |
Winner and new #1 Contender for the AIW Absolute Championship: Tim Donst in 45:45
This was fun at times, it was boring at times. The way the Gauntlet opened was absolutely insane and borderline uncomfortable, but man, was it a great watch. It got really dull in the middle and for most of the ending too, honestly. I love rumble style matches like this, but felt this one left a lot to be desired. That said, it had the perfect ending to it and had enough sick spots to keep me interested through most of it. **1/2
Overall: 8/10 Great. This was a really really good show. The worst match on the card was two stars, and four matches were over three. There was a Match of the Year candidate in ACH vs Lyndon, another awesome scramble match and an incredibly solid Absolute Title match. If Gauntlet for the Gold and Hell on Earth are proof of what this promotion is capable of, I will absolutely be reviewing more in the future, and encourage all of my readers to support them as well.
Biagio eggs on the fans again, but they don't give a fuck except for one guy chanting for Ruben, but I'm not convinced he's not chanting for a Reuben. Really shitty duck duck spinning elbow spot gets Biagio a two count. Ruben chops the man with the shiny tights and eats a spear for his trouble for two. Biagio is supposed to be a heel but keeps asking Ruben if he's all right out of character. He stomps on Ruben's face because fuck noses, nobody needs to smell this shit. We get a rest hold in a match that's so slow paced, it was completely unnecessary! Biagio hits the greatest big boot I've ever
He grabs Loco's bat which has, I think, either Thumbtacks or that button candy you couldn't eat without eating the paper as a kid. Probably the latter. Loco rolls outside looking for a cannoli but V-Pacalypse just ate and grabs a chain to double axe handle with. Loco whips V into a wall and BREAKS THE FUCKING WALL. The owner laughs and says that his deposit is gone and that they're not getting paid now. Legit. Loco hits a belly to back suplex and goes up to the 2nd rope for what was supposed to be a moonsault, but gravity said fuck that. 
There is one barbed wire bat. Just one. This is gonna be fun. We are a full minute in and not one thing has happened. Not one. They lock up at the 1 minute and 15 second mark, and it ends almost immediately and then back to fucking nothing. Really awful chain wrestling happens and ends with a backdrop to the luchador superhero, and he somehow needs a rope
ring, that's it. We start with a lock up because deathmatch rules dictate it. V is horribly overselling a wrist lock and Cali stomps the tacks for the first actually violent spot of the night. Whip into the corner and a bulldog onto the tacks for our second actually violent spot of the night in our third deathmatch. Cali goes to do a hilariously awful double stomp and lands right on the tacks in a spot that is so hilariously terrible. They trade forearms 2 minutes in and then Cali suplexes V onto the tacks for a holy shit chant, but I am noticing that none of the tacks are actually going into either guy.
CALI PULLS OUT THE LEGOS, YOU CAN'T FAKE LEGO BUMPS. THIS IS WORSE THAN TACKS. V goes for a German onto the lego tacks, but he's far too close to do it. They botched a spinebuster in hilarious fashion and this
is at least entertaining kind of. Northern lights by V onto the lego tacks with a nice bridge, and I'm thoroughly impressed with V's bridging ability for a big fella. Worst Irish whip-lariat spot ever onto some legos. Mr California looks like a knockoff Eddie Kingston, and that says a lot. Cali starts sawing into V's arm and finally draws blood. Not a lot, but like a paper cut. Kryptonite Krunch to V onto the legos gets the win.
Chuey grabs a barbed wire bat and stabs Cali with it, but it's the same fake barbed wire as before. And despite being stabbed in the face multiple times, neither man is bleeding. How is that possible? Because this is XWW and they promised us ULTRA FUCKING VIOLET. There's also very obvious stunt glass in the corner, which I'm surprised he can afford. They keep trading shots with random shit until Cali is whipped into the corner through some tubes, then Chuey faces the same fate. Chuey is busted open as we finally get some blood shed, but it looks more like the blood from a picked scab, so who fucking cares at this point. Senseless light tube trading continues and Chuey asks for a guy to check on his forehead, are you kidding me? Chuey waits way too long to goat Cali into it and now they're on the side of the ring with no camera, so I don't know what the fuck is happening, but light tubes are breaking. 
Back in the ring now and we get more tube shots and a death valley driver through the fake pane of glass for a near fall. Fucking Christ, this won't end. Skewers to the head to take a page from MASADA's playbook, but done much much worse. I'm also fairly certain Chuey Martinez is not of Mexican descent. Chuey pulls out a syringe and stabs Cali in the mouth. I told you it was New Jack. Then he grabs another and another and another and stabs him now in the throat. At least now there's actual blood. There's another pane of glass and this time Cali takes the death valley driver through it for the three count.
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